The Beginning

The Boyfriend.. has just recently proposed to me..

Now begins the real journey of learning to be a housewife!

On top of trying to be better with financial responsibilities and learning cooking, household managing, etc, now planning for the wedding has entered the picture.

Sigh.

Well, as a fuss-free person who doesn't exactly like crowds, weddings to me are really an event for our parents to show that "Hey, my kid's tying the knot!". The moment I told my dad that we're starting to plan for the wedding, he told me that he can think of 200 relatives that will be attending. What the???! Honestly, I've never even seen 100 people gather during Chinese New Year on his side >< "But your uncles! your cousins! Your cousins' children!" My mom.. was alternating between telling me, "Oh? The celebrations are in two years' time? So long!" and "You have to tell me your plans now! No time!" (She is already envisioning the perfect garden party >< )

Thankfully less complications on The Fiance's side.. the only thing being, his mom would like us to have a church wedding, and I don't mind at all.

Also, since The Fiance is half-Filipino and I am Indonesian, we are planning for three weddings in total - Singapore, my Indonesian hometown of Pekanbaru, and the Phillipines. (My parents were insisting we have to have four as most of my dad's relatives stay in a different province, but I've managed to dissuade them of that.. phew!)

The thing is, I've never thought that weddings need be grand affairs.. If anything, I thought of my 'big day' as the day my sweet fiance proposed to me, as he gave me not just one, but three(!) parts of a proposal, and involved both our parents giving us their blessings. Both of us have the same view, that weddings are more to make our parents happy and for our friends to partake in our celebrations.

The only thing I can say for sure now, is that, me being Indonesian-Chinese, and him Singaporean-Filipino, FOOD is gonna be a big part of our parties *grin* (though there are complications there also as Filipinos are big on pork and we would like to invite quite a lot of Muslim friends >< )

Ah, well.

Motto: Less Fuss More Fun.. and Bring It On!

The Definition of A Housewife

Hello there!

And welcome to my blog =) Well, just a bit of a background, I'm a 26 years old Indonesian in a very happy relationship with a sweet Singaporean-Filipino guy, and I am every inch the modern youngster. I am, though, fascinated with those group of people called  'SuperWomen' who manage to have a great career, great household, great kids and doting husbands (my mom and my boyfriend's included). I unashamedly aspire to be like them, feminist-thinking be damned. This blog is an attempt to record that learning journey, daunting as it is... but hey, I'm excited!

Well, let's get on to it. Like all subjects that I am either really afraid of or passionate about, I will also approach this whole 'how-to-be-a-housewife' thing systematically. Being a kid-of-the-times, any systematic research will begin with Google, and so I typed in 'virtues of a good housewife'.

Lo and behold, an article from WikiHow popped up. According to them, the definition of a housewife is "a married woman who is not employed outside the home". To be a good housewife you have to:
(read the full article here )

1. Discuss expectations with your partner
2. Maintain a great appearance
3. Learn to cook
4. Be mindful and considerate of your spouse's needs
5. Listen to him
6. Tidy up the house and make the home a pleasant and clean place to live in
7. Improve your skills in the bedroom
8. Find a balance in arguments, but avoid them if possible
9. Love your spouse for who he is
10. Let him take control of certain situations, more so if they are extra personal situations like choosing his hobby, his clothes, his meals etc.

. . . . ARE YOU KIDDING ME??? Didn't know that 'housewife' equals 'model-cook-therapist-maid-whore-psychologist-angel-gracious mommy' all at the same time! >< and that's just for the husband, not even the kids yet!

Whew. Daunting indeed.

Fortunately, The Boyfriend is such a sweet and considerate guy I really wouldn't mind being 'model-cook-therapist-maid-whore etc etc' for him, if possible! But for the purposes of more realistic study, let me define 'housewife' as I think of :

A housewife is someone who does have a career outside the house but manages the household well, making her husband and kids feel special and taken care of, while also cherishes and enjoys intimacy with her husband.

I know.. it kind of violates the convention that a housewife does not go outside the home, but what I feel is that, there are women who work and still make her loved ones feel that she's there for them, and has a well-kept home.. that's what I'm gunning for! *May I just confess that it's still a long way, especially with my 'single-for-long-time-professional-designer' mentality*

But for now, full steam ahead!