Preparing for a m.a.r.r.i.a.g.e

Yep, it's not just about the wedding. Heck, it's really about the years and years and years after instead of just that one day!

And somehow, there's the notion that women know what marriage is about... A quick browse of "ready to get married" yielded articles mostly directed to men.. "8 Signs You Are Ready To Be Tied Down" ('..you no longer find the prospect of one-night-stands that exciting...'), "Top 10 Signs You're Ready To Pop The Question" ('..you love her quirks..') etc. Well, may I confess that as a girl/woman, I know nuts about marriage. I've found 'The One', yes, but what makes me think I'm ready for marriage?

After more searching, found this good article on some parameters whether we ladies are ready for marriage... Here goes my soul searching!

Dancing shoes as wedding shoes.. why didn't I think of it before!

It's not an exaggeration to say one thing I fear the most from my wedding-to-be is the necessity to stand for hours on high heels.. though a girl friend told me, 'that's why you have your groom! you can hang on him for support!' Still, fatigued calves and blisters is really NOT how I wanna spend the so-called big day of my life. Somehow, my right pinky toe is often the one that get blisters even after wearing the shoes for just 1-2 hours and I dread having to stand with blisters for the whole day..

So what's a flip-flop girl to do? As always, every major decision in life starts from Google, (Yes, I did google, "I have a crush on my capoeira senior" and "dating a singaporean guy" before I decided to proceed..). Brilliantly, I found a wedding forum where the ladies raved about wearing dancing shoes as wedding shoes.

Settled on a venue! Finally!

And it will be Furama Riverfront Venus ballroom =) At first, I thought the ballroom was rather old and outdated, with a funny, rather 'muddy' color of carpet, however after seeing the room being set up several times (I actually went back to the hotel twice more to peek at Mercury and Venus ballrooms haha..), I grew to like it. The size is just nice, pillar-less, and quite beautiful after being set up.

Further, I will be able to put in good Indonesian food inside the menu! yay! If there is a 'dream wedding' item on my list..maybe this is it.. I'm so happy about it! Also, the service is very good, I read a lot of rave reviews about the coordinator I'm assigned to, he did throw in lots of perks and even a tasting for Fiance and I at the Indonesian restaurant. (No other hotel offered me tasting if it's the international menu, not the regular chinese banquet menu >< )

What is the point of a honeymoon?

As things are getting settled (ah shucks just remembered I have to design the invitations >< ), Fiance and I are taking the time to think about our honeymoon. Thankfully, the honeymoon has lost its original connotation of the time when the groom try to impregnate a bride that he has kidnapped so the family will let her stay with him >< Nowadays, talking about honeymoon = 'dear, which exotic/ romantic/ perfect paradise with azure blue sky destination are we going to visit?'

Initially we were both quite set on going to Japan again as we both loved Tokyo so much. After coming back from our 8 days Tokyo trip, we both had recurring dreams of Japanese food and culture, that's how bad it was. So.. let's go Japan!

Then again.. a honeymoon isn't just like a vacation, right... A honeymoon is, ahem, a vacation on aphrodisiacs, so to speak. It isn't just about going to beautiful locations, or planning exciting activities, but it's about spending time with your spouse learning about and cherishing each other with physical pleasure.

An insightful article here stated:
"But honeymoons are to serve a special purpose. They are not an ordinary vacation; they are to be a love-fest... lie on the beach, stir only for refills on umbrella drinks, laze in bed every morning, rest, talk, make love and then make love again. They thought my prescription was boring. But, I know that every couple is going to struggle with sex at some point in the marriage. I know that the marital adjustment, the joining of bodies, household, space, finances, and sometimes parenting isn't easy. Sex is the lubricant that eases the wear and tear of daily life. It's the glue that binds a couple emotionally. Eroticism, pleasure, touch, rest and relaxation must be given high priority in order to set a pattern for tangible, physical rejuvenation and connection between the couple. "

Conclusion: a nice hotel room is necessary.

(Almost?) Complete Wedding Venue Listing Singapore

The headaches of venue hunting... (hopefully!) coming to a close.. and really, this seems to be the most 'headache' part of wedding planning together with determining the guest list. Since I've spent so much time finding out about things, unwilling to just let things come to a close quietly hahaha.. I'm putting all the useful links here, and hopefully future brides to be can start their search here to take advantage of all the links provided. No need to sieve through tons of google result!

Venue Hunt: Singapore Hotels

Hotels. The standard wedding venue in Singapore. Initially very reluctant to pay the high prices associated with using hotels, but in the end, considered that hotels do brisk business in holding weddings because heck, they know what they're doing. Peace of mind is priceless, right?

Then again, a bit of shopping around and 'site visit' necessary, since by meeting directly with the hotel personels, some of them readily threw in perks! It's kind of fun too.. Opportunity to drink copious amounts of tea and eat cookies for free ;p

Here are some hotels I've visited and pictures of their ballroom.

Venue Hunt: Singapore Community Clubs

Originally, Fiance and I wanted to hold a wedding in community club. Aside from being relatively cheaper, this venue would allow us to hire our own caterer. We know Chinese restaurants are out, since we don't want  a sit-down Chinese dinner, so we thought this a good option. Furthermore, we want to have performances during our wedding, and community clubs with its high ceiling and proper stage set-up seems very conducive for this.

Complications soon arise though. Different community clubs have different requirements for booking, e.g. some can only confirm the booking 6 months in advance, others 3 months in advance. Also, the venue has to be really set up from scratch including tables & chairs arrangements, decorations, projector & AV equipments, no waiters, etc. Well, if I've organized a wedding before, perhaps I won't be daunted, but this being my first wedding (maybe not last? Don't get me wrong! Maybe I find organizing my own wedding fun & will do it for someone else next time! ) and knowing the event will happen when I'm in the midst of full-time architect work.. also the fear because in case any community event suddenly happening on my date my booking will be cancelled and I'll be scrambling for new venue.. well.. in the end I relented to just hiring hotels.